Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Short Jokes

Conan O' Brian Jokes

Yesterday in a speech President Bush called Dr. Martin Luther King one of the greatest Americans to ever live. He went on to say, "How many people grow up to be a doctor and a king?”

A strange story out of New Orleans. Mayor Ray Naggin has caused a controversy by saying when New Orleans is rebuilt it will be a chocolate city. He also went on to say that the city will be protected by a system of graham cracker levees. Funny Jokes by Conan O' Brian.

Jay Leno Short Jokes

How many people watched "Nip/Tuck” last night? Or as we call it the Golden Globes.

The Golden Globes were last night. It was the biggest gathering of Hollywood celebrities that wasn’t an anti-Bush rally.

The big winners were "Brokeback Mountain”, "Capote” and "Transamerica”. All movies with gay themes. I think this is God’s way of punishing Pat Robertson.

On more serious news, there’s a rumor that we may have killed al Qaeda’s number two man. If it turns out to be true this will be the 387th time we have killed the number two man.

Did you see Kobe and Shaq hugging last night at the Lakers game? I guess the feud is over. If this can happen there can be peace in the Mideast.

Last time Kobe hugged anyone like that he had to buy his wife a diamond ring.

Former Vice-President Al Gore attacked the Bush administration’s use of wire-tapping and torture to combat terrorism. Gore said President Bush has created a police state. Ironically, even in a police state, Al Gore probably couldn’t get arrested.

Letterman Really Funny Jokes

Al Gore yesterday gave a speech an accused President Bush of repeatedly breaking the law. Al Gore issued the statement into a microphone at Taco Bell.

Did you watch the Golden Globes? They were so long that Dick Cheney taped it and is using it to torture detainees.

California executed the oldest death row inmate last night. He was 75 years old. CBS just lost another viewer. Really Funny Jokes by David Letterman.