Monday Night November 7
Leno Daily Jokes
Did you all see that cruise ship on the news that was attacked by pirates? Wasn’t that something? They fired a cannon at it, they fired machine guns at it…look, I know Kathie Lee is annoying but that seems a little harsh.
Not looking good for President Bush’s popularity. It is now at thirty-nine percent. If he drops just three more points, he becomes a Democrat!
As you may have seen on the news, Vice President Dick Cheney’s Chief of Staff Scooter Libby is on crutches. He apparently hurt his foot when he took a fall for Karl Rove.
President Bush ordered the White House staff to attend ethics classes. Not a moment too soon.
You thought FEMA was late.
Republican Senator Charles Grassley…interesting man… has asked the oil companies to use some of the billions of dollars of profit they’ve made recently to help poor people buy home heating oil. That’s when you know you’re making too much money. When Republicans start noticing.
The oil companies said they would like to help the poor people but they need all that money to buy more senators.
Iraq is planning a 5 star hotel plus a theme park in what they’re expecting to be a future tourism boom. Boom being the key word here.
This is now the twelfth day of rioting in France. They have been rioting for almost two weeks. And France has still not surrendered. That’s like a record.
Things are so bad in France, they’re asking the Germans to come back.
The rioters are said to be upset because they are immigrants who have been treated poorly by the French. What? French people treating foreigners rudely? I can’t believe that – stop the presses. Join the club. Short Funny Jokes, Clean Funny Jokes, Really Funny Jokes, Joke of the day.
It was a big weekend in New York City. The marathon was held, it was a big day for Kenya – also known there as pay day.
It was a good marathon – only 12 people are missing.
Tomorrow is Election Day and Mayor Bloomberg is so confident that today he called Florida and told them to cancel the bringing the crooked voting machines.
It’s now the 11th day of rioting in France. Today President Bush said, "Not to worry. The full use of FEMA is on the way.”
President Bush is finishing up his tour of South America. There’s been protestors, unrest, jeering, angry crowds – it’s like he’s right at home.
Short Funny Jokes, Really Funny Jokes, Clean Funny Jokes, Joke of the day.